sorry for my absence, ive had time to go on, just nothing interesting to say really. its weird, my house is silent, just the way i like it. my sisters gone for a retreat all weekend and the house is virtually empty of food. i usually hate cookies, especially chips ahoy, but the other day my mom bought a really good organic kind that didn't look like crap so i was tempted. for 2 days i held off but on tuesday night i gave in and had 8 100 calorie cookies. the funny thing is the first couple were good and totally worth it but being that i haven't had cookies in about a year i scarfed down all of them and began to feel sick, afterwards i purged but lucky me, the apple i had before came out (srry tmi haha). but i made up for it the next day, i wasn't even hungry so i just had 400 calories for dinner which made the same regular 1200 for the day. lately my appetite has been decreasing, food seems more like a chore and im loving it, i couldnt bring myself to eat anything this afternoon so i had a smoothie, for the sake of not ending up in the hospital again i putting off going under 1200. call it recovering, i really dont care, but being that im still losing weight i doubt thats considered recovering. i kinda even enjoy eating 1200 because i have rarely have urges to binge, i just live on an extremely stringent diet plan. the bonus? being vegan gives me the BEST skin! last year i had to wear soo much makeup which didnt even cover it up, yesterday i went to class with NOTHING on:)
i discovered even more thinspo videos on youtube, if you havent already been on the annawillpower channel i totally recommend it, theres TONS of videos on everything from anorexia, to weight loss, to diet fads:)my new fav obsession is that british show from supersize to superskinny, its really interesting!
so lifes quite boring and i better get to studying for my government exam next tuesday:/ im currently loving the blogging community. i read all the blogs but rarely comment, if im on too long my parents might become suspicious.
starve on-chloe
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